Welcome to my world

KENNY LOGAN won more than 70 caps for Scotland during a 13-year rugby career. Both he and his wife Gabby, the BBC sports presenter, competed in the most recent series of Strictly Come Dancing, Kenny finishing fifth to Gabby's 12th.

Photograph: Phil Wilkinson

Having battled with dyslexia since he was a child, he was helped by the Dore programme, aimed at assisting those with learning difficulties. There is a conference on the programme at St Margaret's School, Edinburgh, on March 18. For free tickets, see www.dore.co.uk or call 01926 514033.

Describe your perfect weekend

Taking my wife Gabby out for a nice meal, then spending the rest of the time playing with the kids. They're two and a half now, and lots of fun. I'd probably also watch a bit of rugby.

What would you do if you ruled the world?

I'd have a 'donate a pound' day ever year to raise money for those who can't afford basic things like shelter and food.

What one thing would improve your life?

I've already had it – it was the Dore programme to improve my dyslexia. It worked by using exercise to stimulate part of your brain which helps all your logical functions – like reading, writing, balance and co-ordination. That part of my brain wasn't working properly before, and I couldn't read or write. I can now write cheques, read books, and I can communicate better. More than that, it improved my self-esteem. Even though I was playing rugby for my country, I still felt pretty vulnerable before it.

When did you last feel sorry for yourself?

When I was at school. It was the worst time of my life. I was forever being called thick and stupid.

What do you wish you'd never done?

When I was about 13, I blew up my dad's friend's van, which he kept for spare parts. I stuck a match in the petrol tank and ran, and as I looked back I saw these massive van doors chasing me down the road! I denied all knowledge when my dad asked me, and then I realised my face was black and I was covered in soot from top to toe.

Would your mother be proud of you?

I hope so. I think she is proud of me and my brothers.

When did you lose your virginity?

I waited until I was 21! Only kidding – I think I was about 16.

Who does the cleaning in your house?

We have a cleaner, though Gabby's really tidy and keeps things spotless. When I'm looking after the kids the place is an absolute bomb site.

What's the most you've ever spent on a purchase?

I spent £1,500 on a Dolce & Gabbana jacket. I always feel guilty about it.

What is the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you?

I was at a party and James Blunt walked through the door – I hadn't a clue who he was. I would have recognised him if he'd come in singing, but he didn't. I said, "What do you do?" and he looked at me as if I was an alien.

What is your earliest memory?

Being a happy little kid on the farm.

What song is the theme tune to your life?

'Happy Days'. My life hasn't always been happy, but I now feel it's complete, especially since I've got married and had children. I feel like nothing can stop me now.

What's your guiltiest pleasure?

Sticky toffee pudding. And gadgets.

Who would play you in the movie of your life?

Brad Pitt, of course! Nah, it would probably be either Robbie Coltrane or Peter Kay.

Should you vote?

Yes, you should vote, and I do vote, but sometimes I think all the candidates are as bad as each other.

When were you last naked in front of another person?

This morning, in front of my wife.

Who was your favourite teacher?

It was my PE teacher. He got me, the others didn't, and I had battles with them. Once I asked a teacher to ask me the exam questions out loud, rather than have them written down. She did, thinking it would humiliate me, and I got 9 out of 10! She then sent me out of the room for being insolent.

Who is your fantasy date?

I married my fantasy date.

What would you do if you were invisible?

I'd steal from the rich and give to the poor.