Drumranlig

STRAIGHT from the You-Couldn't-Make-It-Up school of government decisions.

GIVE US A BREAK

STRAIGHT from the You-Couldn't-Make-It-Up school of government decisions. The Department for Work and Pensions last week published a list of all the publications it subscribes to for its staff to read. Hidden among the reams of dull trade magazines and public sector bibles was the ladies' favourite… Take a Break.

MURPHY'S GUFFAW

THE meeting between First Minister Alex Salmond and Scottish Secretary Jim Murphy last week offered a good example of the power shift in Scottish politics since devolution. When Murphy and his three advisers entered the room they were taken aback to discover not only the entire Scottish cabinet but also around a dozen advisers and officials all squeezed in behind the First Minister. Salmond began the meeting by asking Murphy to introduce himself and his staff. "Just as well as you don't introduce all of yours…" he quipped back.

WIMBLEDON WAGON

LABOUR wins the award for the most shameless attempt to cash in on Murray-mania this weekend. The party stuck out a press release on Friday to declare how appalled it was after it discovering that a third of Scottish councils have no tennis facilities. Sports spokesman Frank McAveety, above, declared: "Andy Murray's fantastic performances at Wimbledon will inspire thousands of youngsters to get involved in sport. We need to provide them with places to play." Stop that bandwagon, Frank wants to get on.

LONG PAYMENT TERMS

ARE the SNP coffers not quite as flush as they once were? Local party activists have received a note from HQ ordering them to pony up £400 each for the forthcoming Glasgow North East by-election campaign. The order has been met with a certain hostility by the local branches who aren't exactly rolling in it themselves. They should have plenty of time to find the dough however. The rumour is that Labour is now hoping to keep the by-election back until November, as it seeks to prevent a pre-party conference embarrassment.

LOSING HIS BOTTLE?

WHATEVER happened to Kenny MacAskill's crusade against the demon drink? Drinks chiefs have noticed that the voluble MacAskill, below, has been all but air-brushed from the SNP government's campaign against cheap booze, having been replaced with the more emollient health secretary Nicola Sturgeon at a summit on drink last week. MacAskill's up-and-at-'em style was deemed to be counter-productive by the powers that be at Bute House, we hear, and so he has been quietly told to go and do something else. More's the pity.